Things We Learned in Switzerland

1. The Swiss DO have a sense of humor, sort of. But they have only one known comedian and he lives in NYC.

2. Switzerland is an endless panorama of postcard photos stitched together. It gets tiresome trying to capture it in word or photos--you have to see it for yourself.

3. Cannondale owns Sugoi.

4. Swiss restaurants may be run by the same conglomerate that runs airport concessions in the US. That is to say, in general, the food is expensive and has the imagination and flavor of airport food. Which is to say, it isn't necessarily BAD, most people just don't drive to the airport to eat.

5. $25/hour is the minimum wage for housekeepers in Switzerland. EVERYTHING is expensive in Switzerland!

6. 12 guys can stay on the topic of cycling at least 80% of the time for a week.

7. Rich is a stud cyclist and helluva Ride Commish. Among other things, when I'd be ready to lay my head on my handlebars and moan at the top of a mountain, Rich would come up with his big grin and say, "Wasn't that GREAT?!!"

8. There is a REALLY good doctor in Zermatt, CH.

9. Don't follow too closely over wet, acutely-angled train tracks (unless you like an intimate relationship with the road.)

10. Never pass up a good rope swing into a lake.

Can you add to the list?

The Swiss Cows

We shopped at a bike store along the route for commemorative jerseys. Those of us who exhibited especially fine taste in jersey design dubbed ourselves, "The Swiss Cows."

Markham Meets Heidi

Just as we were to begin the final 7 km up Glaubenbuelen Pass, we stopped to admire a view and, lo and behold, Heidi appeared again!

She wasn't as pretty, tall or animated as the first Heidi, but we knew it was fortuitous that she would show up on our final day and we made sure not to pass up this encounter. Her grandfather and a woodchopper were hanging out with her, as well as a white goat.

Splashdown

Our final cruise down a Swiss mountain was relaxed as we savored the experience of breathtaking vistas, speed, turns and tired legs. Charles, Markham, Jim and I followed the edge of the lake below Glaubenbuelen, then another lake's edge, lingering to absorb our final hours on a bike in Switzerland. We reached Lake Lucerne at 1 PM and turned onto a winding, one-lane road pressed hard into the sheer rock wall that formed the side of the lake. The lake lay 12' below the road.

Someone spotted a rope swing hung from a tree rooted into the rock cliff. We stopped to have a look. A steel ladder was pitoned into the cliff about 80' away, extending from the road down into the water. We had an hour to ride the final 2 km to the ferry.

"I'm doing it!" announced Jim. He stripped down to his cycling shorts, jumped off the edge and surfaced in the lake below. "Come on! It's fantastic!" he shouted up. Todd R., Rick and Rich soon arrived, and one by one we stripped and joined Jim in a terrific splash, a fitting exclamation point to our final day of the Swiss Challenge.

Mano a Mano

Glaubenbuelen Pass was Day 7's profiled climb, and it promised to be fairly easy, 15.6 km at an average of 4.6% although the last 5 km showed 7 - 9%. It wasn't easy. Once again, the on-the-ground experience didn't match the profile as the Garmins kept registering 10% and 12% ramps. To a man, our legs were tired, effectively adding another 2% to the climbing impression.

Markham and Charles, though, were undeterred-- when they hit the upturn at km 10 they were abreast in an unspoken duel up the last 5 km. It was mano a mano. Both had a point to make. Charles had taken considerable ribbing for his off-day before the KOM race up Susten Pass; Markham had consistently been the strongest rider up every climb except Susten and Furka. Glaubenbuelen was turning into a tie-breaker of sorts.

They quickly dropped Rick and I as they surged up some switchbacks. After 4.5 of the 5 km they were still even, then Charles amped it up to 325 watts and held it there for the final .5 km to lead Markham into a view overlook near the top. It was a bravura performance and indisputable validation of Charles' KOM title on Susten. I assume they exchanged a fist-bump of mutual respect, although truth be told, I didn't arrive in time to see it. Rick followed them into the overlook a couple minutes later.

The only problem was--the view overlook wasn't the summit of Glaubenbuelen. They had blown each other up and stopped 0.5 km short! This, conveniently, allowed me to channel my hero, Howie, and steadily pedal past them on my way to the top, where, arriving first, I raised my thumb and index finger to shoot the summit sign in triumph.

Day 7: Crash

Our weather luck appeared to run out on the final day as we arose to fog and light rain. We left Luderenalp, an inn atop a low mountain, early because we had to meet the Lake Lucerne ferry at 2:18 PM and we were aware that trains, planes and ferries in Switzerland run on time. We were also by now aware that bikes under our guidance didn't necessarily run on time, Switzerland or not. We had 60 miles to go and a mountain to climb.

We started as a group descending the mountain carefully, then headed up the valley in the rain. 5 km on a railroad track crossed the road at an obtuse angle and the lead rider lost his front wheel on the slippery metal and hit the deck. By the time the yelling and clatter of bikes was over, 5 riders were down. It took us 20 min. to evaluate bikes, bones and bruises. Our weather luck had seemingly run out but our riding luck held as everyone was able to mount and pedal, albeit with more care and less cheer. Another hour on and the rain subsided and blue sky tugged at the edges of the cloud cover. By the time we started our last profiled climb of the trip, the sun was shining again.

Day 6- Lost in Interlaken

It dawned cool and bright, another beautiful day. This promised to be an easy-paced 55 miles with only 2 profiled climbs, neither very difficult compared to what we had recently done. We detoured up a valley to a bike shop in a small town where we bought them out of Swiss cow bike jerseys and other memorabilia. Some of our group went to see a waterfall inside a mountain, others explored further up the valley. Everything was leisurely--we had the illusion of plenty of time.

We split into smaller groups based on our puttering around, and Howie, Chris, Steve and I eventually set off down the valley for Interlaken, the town, where we promptly got lost. Directions were sketchy at best. We asked 4 different people and got no answers that clearly corroborated each other. We didn't speak SwissGerman and apparently our English wasn't too clear either. After an hour delay, Howie navigated us through the town and along the north side of Interlaken, the lake. We had pizza alongside the river in Thun, with 6 more of our gang arriving just as we left to head cross country to Luderenalp, our final destination. Once again, directions were sketchy and we soon found ourselves on the wrong road. In this case, it turned out to be fortuitous as we found out later we apparently circumvented the first profiled climb of the day.

Somehow, we turned 55 mi. into 79 miles and lots of map study before arriving at Luderenalp at 6 PM. And we were the first to arrive. The other six arrived 45 min. later, and Markham and Charles arrived last, pulling up at 7:45 PM in the Lanterne Rouge, also known as the broomwagon, earning a DNF for the day.